


Conflict and Completion

by mcgarrygirl78



Series: Thicker than Water [65]
Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Alternate Universe, Drama, F/M, Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-06
Updated: 2012-03-06
Packaged: 2017-11-01 13:12:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/357183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mcgarrygirl78/pseuds/mcgarrygirl78
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“How come everything you do can be construed as sexy?”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Conflict and Completion

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING: ALLUSIONS TO CHILDHOOD SEXUAL ABUSE. This story is written in the Thicker than Water universe, where the BAU are kids and teens. I’m back where I should be in their timeline, summer of 1998. Going ahead for a while was fun but there’s much to be explored right here. This started with citymusings’ prompt of ‘Jason and his clever Katya have a special way of flirting all their own’.

“Why are you looking at me that way?”

“Its fascinating…you're fascinating.”

“Am I?”

“Absolutely.” He nodded. “I mean the things you do, that women do. They’re fascinating.”

“I'm shaving my legs, Jason.” She laughed some. “It’s not like I'm climbing Everest.”

“I know but…” he sighed, unsure how to frame his words. Only she could do that to him.

“What I don’t understand is why I even have to do this.” Emily ran the razor underwater and back up her leg. “After thousands of years genetics should've stopped me from growing hair in unwanted places.”

“I don’t think genetics works that way. It gives you what you need and humans need hair. If it doesn’t grow on your legs then it won't grow on your head or your…”

“Or my…?” her voice teased him.

“Stop it.” Jason smiled.

“You start it and I have to stop. One of these days you're going to have to let me know how that’s fair.”

“How come everything you do can be construed as sexy?” he asked.

“It’s a gift I guess. Ow, shit.”

“Are you alright?” Jason came over and looked at her bleeding leg. “Oh my God,”

“I just cut myself. I was almost home free too. Could you wet some paper towel for me?”

Jason did as she asked and watched Emily clean up the little wound. It wasn’t too bad so she went up her leg with the razor once more.

“I read an article once about couples shaving each other.” he said.

“And what magazine would that have been in?” Emily pulled the razor from her skin and laughed. She rinsed her leg, dried it, and then moved the other one onto the rim of the bathtub. She looked at Jason sitting on the closed toilet seat. “Are you going to tell me you read _Playboy_ for the articles?”

“I've never read _Playboy_ …I've never even looked at it.”

“Are you serious?” she stopped with a dollop of shaving cream in the palm of her hand. “You’ve never even looked at it?”

“No,” he shook his head. “I have no reason to.”

“I think curiosity would be a good start. I've even enjoyed a _Playboy_ or two in my time. It’s definitely fancier than some of the other magazines out there; classier. But these days it’s starting to look too airbrushed; all fake boobs and dyed blondes. What do you use for stimulation, you know for those special moments?”

“Special.” Jason smirked. “Em, I'm 19 years old. I could stand here for 5 minutes, think about my penis getting hard, and it'll get hard.”

“You just said penis.” She laughed as she covered her leg up to her knee in shaving cream.

“What do you expect me to call it? Nevermind,” he held up his hand. “I'm not sure I want to know.”

“Do it right now then.” Emily’s eyes sparkled.

“Well, I'm being slightly facetious but still serious in a way. Those magazines could never turn me on. I find them to be misogynistic. The objectification of women doesn’t sexually excite me.”

“OK. Well what about naked women?”

“How did we get on this conversational path?” he asked, scratching his head.

“I think you started it.”

“Uh huh, I bet. Would you think me strange if I said naked women don’t turn me on?”

“Yes. Naked women even turn Hotch on and I love my twin but the boy is repressed with a capital R.”

“Half the time I just want to cover them up.” Jason replied. “They shouldn’t have to do that just to get male attention or anyone’s for that matter.”

“You are so adorable.” She looked at him before going back to her leg. “Do you want me to cover up when I'm naked, Jace?”

“No.” he shook his head. “I want…”

“What do you want?”

“You're my girlfriend. Your nudity is much different from that of a strange woman. You’re real and they're not. I think you said it best…fake boobs and dyed blondes.”

“You're such a curious creature.” Emily grimaced when she nicked herself again. Oh yeah, it was time for a new razor.

“I do hope that’s a good thing.”

“It’s the best. That means that I have the rest of my life to find out all these wonderful things about you.”

“I want to find out things about you too. I want to know everything Emily; good, bad, and everything else.”

“I think we should get back to talking about nakedness.” She said.

Jason wasn’t sure if Emily would ever open herself fully to him. He knew she had bad things in her past and they’d only been alluded to. Truthfully, he wasn’t sure he wanted the dirty details. But he wanted her, her soul and heart and bad memories too. 

He wanted her wholly. That’s what you got when you loved someone. It wasn’t just the shiny stuff on top of the rock but the dirt and worms underneath. That’s what his father always said. He said love, real love, was the dirt and worms.

“We’ve discussed that enough I think.” He got up to give her a gentle kiss on the forehead. “You can tell me something that turns you on…if you want to.”

If she wanted to, was he serious? Jason had no idea how much she wanted to. Emily was shocked they were even having this conversation. He usually avoided it like the clap. It was like just talking about sex meant they were going to tear each other clothes off and have it. 

She’d told him so often that there were a million ways to be sexy, intimate, sexual…Jason didn’t seem to hear her. He always thought about coitus and got freaked out. It wasn’t as if they didn’t love second base. It wasn’t about going all the way for Emily. It was just about Jason letting go enough to love her and to let himself be loved.

“I love your back.” Emily rinsed her razor, wrapping it in toilet paper before putting it in the trashcan. Then she rinsed and dried her leg. I love the smattering of freckles there. I love your spine and your shoulder blades. I'm fascinated with your skin.”

Jason smiled, and it grew when Emily wrapped her arms around him. Here they were standing in the middle of the bathroom floor in a passionate embrace. It was just after eleven so there was little chance of Spencer or Ashley interrupting. Still, Jason preferred safe to sorry. 

He picked his girlfriend up in his arms, Emily letting out a squeal of excitement as she wrapped her legs around his waist. He turned and walked into the bedroom, closing the bathroom door with his foot. He wanted to be alone with her. He wanted to talk, kiss, and touch. God, Jason really wanted to touch.

“You're just sixteen years old.” He whispered as his Dartmouth tee shirt came over his head. He leaned back on the pillows, Emily straddling him. “Sometimes I worry…”

“I’ll be seventeen in two months.” she leaned and gave his shoulder a gentle bite. “Jason, I love you.”

“I love you too.” he caressed her face. “I will always love you Katya.”

“Mmm,” she kissed him and held on tight. “We do what we do because we love each other. Nothing will ever make me think it’s not right.”

“It scares me.”

“What scares you?” Emily stroked her hands down his chest. “You can tell me anything.”

“I don’t want to push. I don’t want you to grow up too fast because you think it pleases me.”

“I hope you really don’t think that’s true. My desire for you is limitless. We’re both young and our life together is a bit unconventional. But you, you and I, we’re the reason I'm complete.”

“I complete you?” Jason asked, smiling despite the serious turn the conversation had taken. He brought her closer and pressed his forehead on hers.

“Duh.” She playfully rolled her eyes.

“Will you say it?”

“You complete me Jason Gideon.” Emily kissed his nose. Then she kissed his mouth, running her fingers through his raven ringlets. When he moaned and shivered, it excited her. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“So,” she leaned to whisper in his ear. “Can I take off all your clothes and make you mine?”

“Katya…” Jason laughed nervously. 

He took hold of her hands, brushing his lips across her knuckles. His body reacted to her words, it was impossible not to, but that didn’t make it right. She was only 16 years old and should not be having sex like a grown woman. Emily had enough grown up responsibilities.

“Don’t say no.” she pouted some, still whispering. “Let go Jason, and let me love you.”

“I can't help myself. I want you so much.”

Emily smiled. She loved that he found her irresistible. It had nothing to do with the ego boost. The truth was that Emily was a bit insatiable. Lindsay told her once that it was just hormones; nothing to be ashamed of. 

That was exactly why some teenagers had sex or jerked off like bunnies. Just like grownups, they had different pistons firing and hormones raging. Some weren't interested at all and some couldn’t get enough. Emily was the latter sometimes. 

She thought that might have something to do with why Jason wanted to wait until she was 18. He felt her heat almost immediately, knew it would be hard to say no. That was usually because he was as hungry as she was. Why should it be a sin to want just one person, the same person who wanted you back?

Kissing him, Emily turned out the lamp. She undressed him in the dark and then undressed herself. When they were naked together, Jason held her close. He needed to feel her…needed the soft parts of her to caress the hard parts of him. If this was wrong then he never wanted to be right again. 

There might never come a time when he felt completely comfortable in their sexual intimacy. It might come when Emily turned 18; it might not. Jason was sure he would be OK when they were man and wife. Then nothing could tear them apart. He couldn’t help but fear losing her…he’d lost so many that he loved already.

“Oh Katya,” his back arched when her mouth was on him. “Oh God, don’t stop.”

It felt so good, she felt so good. Emily was so generous in giving love to him. She never shied away or had to be cajoled. She liked it and that was hard for Jason to wrap his mind around. 

How did she even learn to do what she was doing? How did she know what to do with her mouth, her hands, his parts…was it an animal instinct? Because he had to read up on all of her parts; he had to read a lot. Or was it something more sinister that he had to stop thinking about before the moment was ruined altogether.

“Oh God,” Jason whimpered, grabbing the sheets instead of Emily. He was coming, it was happening, and it was awesome. It was always so awesome. Even better when she climbed on him, pressed her body against his, and kissed him breathless. “Oh my God. I should…”

“Shh,” Emily kissed him again. “You don’t have to do anything.”

“But it’s not fair that you do something like that and I just get to lay back and benefit.”

Jason was surprised when Emily laughed. He looked at her, wanted an explanation for it.

“When you pleasure me, do you expect me to return the favor?” she asked.

“No.” he shook his head.

“So why should I expect you to?”

“Well…” Jason stopped. He wasn’t really sure how to answer that. He had some words but he didn’t think they would come out right. The teenage boy sighed. “Can I be honest?”

“Yes.” She nodded. Emily took hold of both of his hands. Whatever he said to her would be OK. She wanted honesty; the rest was just window dressing.

I've never done this before and I’ll never do it again so you have to bear with me sometimes.”

“Always.” She smiled. “You bear with me too, Jace.”

“I just, I know someone made you do things you didn’t want to do. You couldn’t say no and I never want to think I might be doing the same.”

“You're not.” Emily shook her head, feeling the tears burn the back of her eyes. “Jason, I swear on a stack of bibles. We make love because I want to and when you're satisfied it makes me happy. And when you want me, it makes me happy. All of this, us, makes me happy. My Uncle can burn in hell…this has nothing to do with him.”

“OK.” He nodded.

“I'm serious.”

“I know.” He pulled her into his embrace. “I'm sorry for bringing it up.”

“No, don’t be sorry.” Emily kissed him. “I love you. And I don’t mind talking to you. Of course I don’t want to get into the dirty details but it’s a part of my life. It will always be that way. But it was a long time ago and it’s not a factor in what we have now.”

Jason nodded again, holding her tighter. He just wanted to protect her. He wanted to kill Jonathan so it was probably a good thing that he was dead. What he did was horrific, and he did it to the girl that Jason loved most in the world.

“I do feel good.” He said.

“And I do too.”

“So stay with me tonight.”

Emily smiled, cuddling as they lay in the bed. There were probably a million things to say but the quiet was fine too. She loved Jason, trusted him, and wanted him to know that he could never hurt her in that way. It hurt to know that her past might have something to do with his apprehension. 

Emily never wanted to repulse him…it was one of her greatest fears. But they’d been intimate and she knew that wasn’t true. When that little voice in her brain tried to tell her otherwise, she shut it down. Jason loved her as much as she loved him.

“What if we get an early morning wake up call?” Emily asked.

“I think the kids are getting better with knocking.” Jason replied smiling. “Don’t you move…I need to hold you.”

She sighed against him and Jason knew she wasn’t going anywhere. One day they wouldn’t have to have the conversation about who would leave the bed. He was anxious for that day to come. He was anxious for Emily to be his wife and for them to spend the rest of their lives together. 

Jason knew what she meant when she said her love for him was limitless. He felt the same. He felt that way almost from the moment he met her. It was a beautiful, scary, overwhelming, awesome feeling. To share that feeling with someone as amazing as Emily made Jason Gideon feel like the luckiest guy in the world.

***


End file.
